Kill My Boyfriend, Yeah
by Dajypop
Summary: A group of 10 song-inspired drabbles for the Indie movie Death and Cremation, for the pairing Stan/Jarod. Ratings from K-M


**Title: Kill My Boyfriend, Yeah  
Author: Daisy  
Fandom: Death and Cremation  
Setting: Varies through the different ones; In-world as well as AU  
Pairing: Stanley "Stan"/Jarod Leary, Implied Matt Fairchild/Jarod Leary and Stanley/Matt/Jarod  
Genre: Romance/Humor/Crime/Hurt/Comfort/Friendship  
Rating: K-M  
Chapters: 1/1  
Word Count: 2002 {All story-parts combined only}  
Type of Work: Music Meme/Challenge  
Status: Complete  
Warnings: Implied Sex, Implied Threesome, Gore, Blood, Fluff, Fire, Spoilers, AU, In-World, Vague Pedophilia (59 year old X 17-almost-18 year old), Cradle Robbing, Self-Beta'd, Possible OOC on some of them.  
Disclaimer: I do not own Death and Cremation, or any of the songs used. The ideas that sprout from said things are, however, my own.  
Spoilers: Yes, for most of the movie, as well as AU things that may or may not have anything to do with actual spoilers; Mainly spoilers for the ending can be found in some of them.  
Summary: A group of 10 song-inspired drabbles for the Indie movie Death and Cremation, for the pairing Stan/Jarod.**

AN: I've been trying to write some lately, and can never seem to finish anything. I'm going to attempt to work on these as a sort of warm-up, and see how it goes from there. ^^ If anyone would like to see any of these as a full story, please let me know and I may try to do at least a one-shot of it. ^^

**MUSIC MEME RULES****  
**_**1. Pick a character, pairing, or fandom you like.  
2. Turn on your music player and put it on random/shuffle.  
3. Write a drabble related to each song that plays. You only have the time frame of the song to finish the drabble you start when the song starts, and stop when it's over. No lingering afterwards!  
4. Do ten of these, then post them.**_****

**Kill My Boyfriend, Yeah******

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**1. Barbie Is A Bitch (Gay Barbie Song) by Weird Al – 1:27 – In-World – Third Person POV - Shortly after Jarod is hired at Stanley Crematorium**

It wasn't exactly a manly song to get caught dancing to, but Jarod was marginally sure that dancing around the Crematorium, singing into the broom handle, shaking what his Father mother gave him to the 'Gay Barbie Song' was better than the original, at least. Stan was never too sure what to think of the teen after that.

**2. Her Name Is Alice by Shinedown – 3:40 – In-World – Jarod-Centric, Stan POV – While driving after the Victim scene, after supposedly killing those people**

To crawl into Jarod's ear, and find his brain, then the wormhole to slip into his mind would be scary, I think. He has no problem with what we do, which is helpful, but he acts as though his entire person, mind, body, everything, turns numb when he is faced with change. And, the forceful throttling and eventual death of a person by one's own hands is _quite_ the change. His curiosity seems to have numbed him enough, but the pain of what happened to him is always swimming under the surface.

There's no real ending to this; none that we want to think about. But Jarod more than anyone needs to focus on the future, on becoming careful and not staying as careless as he is, now. Though I know he'll have things to teach me, just as well. I glance over at him, and gently jostle him awake, startling him. With a slow yawn, he seems to realize he fell asleep on me, and he glances down at the crossword in his lap.

"Oh, uh, shit... Right. Um... 15. Down, someone who rescues a person, place, or property."

"How many letters?" He takes a moment to count quietly before piping up.

"...Six."

"Six letters... Rescues a person, place, or pro-...Knight."

**3. In The Middle by Kazaky – 2:32 – AU – Third Person POV – Matt Fairchild and Stan are semi-friends, and Matt introduces a young youth he found whoring out to Stan as if to help him. He sure helped himself, though.**

"This is Jarod, then, Matt?" The elder looked the dark-haired teen up and down while polishing something that appeared to be a mug. Setting it down, he moved over and gave the boy several more interested glances, before turning to his younger friend.

The cop nodded slowly, "Caught him again, out on the corner... I think he needs to learn a lesson no jail will teach him."

"I'm right here," Jarod groused, "No need to pretend I'm not. What are you going to do to me, then, huh?"

"Mm, boy, it isn't what we're going to do _to_ you, so much as _for_ you."

Before Jarod knew what was happening, both men were pressed tight to him, Matt in front and Stanley behind, and a moan worked from his lips. This would be interesting... Grinding between the two of them, the writhing mass of men made their way for Stan's bedroom, with Jarod switching positions several times to keep his boys in check.

**4. Feed Me (Git It) from Little Shop of Horrors – 3:27 – In-World – Third Person POV - Stan thinks Jarod needs to see a **_**decent**_**play, and one that is relevant, after they leave their old town.**

"Feed me..." The crooning whine from beside him was enough to make Stan chuckle a little, "_Feed me!_" The demand was slightly annoying, but Jarod looked so cute as he sang, seeming to have really liked watching _Little Shop of Horrors_. "Feed me, Stanley... Feed me all night loooooong~!" He howled, dancing a little ahead. Stanley rolled his eyes and shoved his hands deeper in his pockets, just listening, before finally managing to respond.

"I don't know... I don't knooooow. I have soooooo, so many strong... Reservations. Should I goooo, and perfooorm... Mutilations." The way he smiled behind those glasses lit something in Jarod, and he licked his lips, leaning in a bit as he walked backwards, leading the way to their hotel.

Someone bumped into him and scowled, dropping a soft, "Freak," before looking at Stan and frowning, "Keep your freak on a leash."

The two looked between each other before grinning.

"The guy sure looks like plant food to me~..."

**5. Can't Help Falling In Love by The A-Teens – 3:07 – In-World – Jarod POV, Stan-Centric – Shortly after he finds out what Stanley is doing in the Crematorium.**

I didn't really get it at first. I still don't think I know all of the reasoning, but it doesn't really matter, I guess. I finally get why it doesn't matter that we don't have a lot of customers... This isn't a business for the sake of business... It's a cover-up. And.. It's not the only cover-up I want, anymore.

Stan asked me if I regretted going downstairs... I wanted to tell him 'yes' so he didn't think I was weird... But I looked him in the eye and told him simply, "Cremation doesn't bother me. None of it does."

He took my hand, and after that I knew I was in love. I can't do more than explain it like that... I couldn't help it, it just happened. And, now, I want to be with him, no matter what happens to us. That's probably why we're on the road, now...

**6. Hardware Store by Weird Al – 3:44 – In-World – Third Person POV – After the pair go on their "fishing trip", they need supplies.**/u

The entire day had been comprised of the pair of them trying to make themselves seem as inconspicuous as possible. They used cash only, and skipped around different towns to buy their new equipment. They had been forced to, for now, abandon Stanley Crematory, if only for a while, until the police presence calmed down. Then, they could possibly go back... Or, at least, that was what Stan told Jarod to keep him from worrying too much about his mom.

Stalking the aisles, Jarod picked up things and set them back down, until he was scolded into buying everything he'd touched that may or may not be useful. Among these items was an irregular, two-foot long piece of PVC pipe, no thicker than half of Jarod's wrist. He ended up tossing it in with everything else, and they decided to pay and head out.

"Hardware stores need to have less things that I want to touch." Jarod groused, when questioned about touching just about _everything_.

"You need to be more careful," Stan chided, "You could lead them right to us, Jarod." It seemed, however, that the boy was still peeved from having to dye his hair a different color (so, now he had blonde tips and it seemed to frustrate him).

**7. Promiscuous Girl by Nelly Furtado – 4:04 – AU – Third Person POV - Main plotline is followed, after David's interrogation of Jarod, Jarod is found to have slept with him, and Stan wants to put an end to it.**

As Jarod limped slightly up to his employer's home, he wasn't entirely sure what to tell him. Knocking, he awkwardly shifted his weight, hissing a little in pain. At first, there was no answer, so he pounded his fist a little harder, and finally he heard a rather unhappy snarl from inside.

"I'm coming, I'm coming..." When he pulled the door open, however, his anger lifted and concern took its place, "Jarod? What happened?"

"C-can I use your phone?" That was all he was willing to offer, for now.

"Yes, of course..." Welcoming the limping boy into his home, he tried to figure out if his leg was hurt, or what had happened. And then he noticed it; the back of his tight pants were soaked and clinging to his body, likely uncomfortable. Something about it made him frown and he could feel his blood boiling in his veins, anger bubbling to the surface. However, he moved back to his couch and sat down, picking up his crossword while the younger called his mother. Shaking his head when he heard that he'd be harboring the youth that night, he sighed when the other got off the phone.

"Did... Who did this, Jarod?" His glare was obvious, and the boy felt it was his fault.

"Just some jackasses at school..." He murmured, about to continue when Stan shushed him.

"From now on, I'm the only one allowed to do things like that to you." Jarod looked up, lost.

"Like... This?" He asked, pointing to his bleeding forehead.

"No, like _that_." Stan replied, gesturing between his legs. Jarod blushed darkly, but nodded slightly and curled up a little more. It still _hurt_, but it was a tempting offer.

**8. Falling In Love At A Coffee Shop by Landon Pigg – 3:45 – AU – Third Person POV – Starbucks AU, anyone?**

It wasn't the best job in the world, but Jarod did it day in and day out to stay out of his mom's trailer, and far away from Rick. It helped that every day, there was an older man that came into this particular Starbucks at precisely 5:25pm, when his break was over. He would saunter in as though nothing ever bothered him, and he was perfectly fine, even if the teen would watch him limp slightly once he was out of the store. Then, he would make sure that Jarod took his order... And every day, it was the same, as with everything else.

"Tall mocha frappuccino, extra whipped cream." He would smile almost seductively, and the teen was sure his expression reflected some kind of naughtiness, as well.

"Coming right up, Stanley." He offered with a smile, moving to begin making it up. He was the only one working at this point, waiting on his coworker to return from break. Here was where the usual began to change, however.

"You can call me Stan, Jarod." He offered with a smile, turning it slightly sweeter. "I was wondering... Do you have any plans after work?"

Pausing, he stared at the other for a moment before cracking a grin; nobody but Stan got to see these. "Not that I know of... I'd rather go somewhere with you than home."

"What about my home?"

**9. Under Pressure by David Bowie – 3:57 – In-World/Vague AU – Jarod POV - Detective Fairchild has his own way of figuring out Jarod's relationship with Stanley.**

"Jarod, I know you know _something_ about Stanley..." Matt pressed, not only the question but also my body into the wall.

"I... I don't know anything, so..." I glance around, wondering how much trouble I would be in with Stan if I tried to kill this guy... But I know I'd probably be in a shit _ton_ of it.

"So? Jarod, you work with the guy. Has he never acted strangely toward you?" That damn detective, he had no idea what he was asking. Had he ever 'acted strange'? Like, more than usual, or what? On top of that, after the night before... It was hard to tell what 'strange' was. I'd lost my virginity to my _fifty-nine year old boss_, but I don't think it's really what Matt was talking about.

"Well, no... Not really, nothing out of the ordi-"

"I smell him on you, son.." He whispered into my ear, "Not just his clothes, either... What are you hiding?"

"N-nothing, I'm done talking." Pushing the cop aside, I quickly bound around the corner and off towards Stan's to tell him. I think we may be caught... And I'm not too good under pressure.

**10. Smoker's March by Richie Phillips – 1:44 – In-World – Third Person POV – On the drive out of town, after the "Victim" was likely killed.**

"Why do you insist on smoking in my car?" Stan grumbled, "At least roll down the window." Of course, he wasn't happy. Jarod didn't_listen_, because he didn't _want_ to stop. "You're going to look like me when you grow up if you don't quit."

"What's so bad about that?" Jarod questioned, turning to look at the other from his curled up position, foot on the door and the other on the floor, "I'll be hot, at least."

He relished in the light blush on Stanley's cheeks, as the man turned away and continued to drive, focusing on the road instead of Jarod's cigarettes.

**BONUS~! 11. All The Stars In Texas by Ludo – 3:14 – In-World/Vague AU – Third Person POV – After the movie, the two begin having to steal to stay alive. Now they are both killing and stealing.**

If nothing else, the world was beginning to revolve around the stars in Jarod's eyes. Perhaps they burned as bright and brilliant as the sun; perhaps they didn't. Even if he had no idea how to go about saying it most times, Stanley was often blown away by the younger male's beauty. The feminine curve of his nose, high cheekbones, hell, he even wore makeup! What about that was not to like?

At the same time, Jarod was always totally overwhelmed with how wrapped up in Stan he was. He'd almost go so far as to say he was tangled in his web... But the other had taken him from his mother and her problems, had saved him... Even if they couldn't save anyone else.

"Check that drawer, please.." Stan told him quietly, dragging the body of who they perceived as the wife to the bedroom, "Then go start the car, beautiful." Winking, he left Jarod blushing and nervously checking the drawer. He grabbed out two wedding bands, blinking a little, not quite getting it. However, he had to go start the car, and he did, while gasoline was poured around the house. They'd made so many mini-crematories, by now...

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End file.
